Of course, if you follow-through long enough, it is likely to work. But, in my experience, for some babies, this only irritates and upsets them more that you are “teasing” them with your frequent visits. ![]() The book seems to assume a fairly adaptable baby will soothe within a few minutes and allow you to leave the room again to repeat the soothing every 5 minutes. In addition, there are no guidelines in the book about how long to let your baby cry in total or what if he doesn’t calm down when you are patting him. This means that even if you are trying to soothe the baby, it could be a lot of crying, not a little. The book says that there is less crying using this method, however, in my experience of 10+ years, not all babies will calm much, or at all, if you don’t pick them up. ![]() If you are uneasy about using a crying method, especially being out of the room, you may want to consider a gentle sleep training method. It undermines your efforts and all you’ve done is delay sleep. It is true, however, that if you continue to let your baby cry for longer and longer periods and then end up putting him to sleep the same way you always have, this will only lead to more crying, not less. One thing I disagree with in Twelve Hours’ Sleep By Twelve Weeks is that Suzy says that if you let your baby cry longer, he will think “If I cry 15 minutes, I will get picked up.” Young babies are not capable of manipulation nor have a sense of time. There are several variations of controlled crying and it can be personalized. We call this “controlled crying” and it’s a milder form of The Ferber Method. The approach is simply to let your baby cry for 5 minutes at a time with you out of the room before you intervene and soothe her without picking her up. In case you were wondering, the author of this book calls her method “The Limited Crying Solution” and a happy medium between cry-it-out and no-cry methods. It’s a balance to see what might work for ALL of you. So, when you add a family member, you need to consider her needs but also not forget about your own. I prefer to think that every family member’s needs should be considered when developing habits around your home whether it’s sleep or other things. Your baby’s temperament WILL be a huge factor as far as how adaptable she may be. ![]() It may not be realistic to expect your higher needs baby to stay awake in a restaurant at that time every Sunday and it may take you days to get the schedule back on track. Perhaps you go out to dinner with your parents every Sunday at 7 PM. Although some people do attempt to do this, it can be unrealistic for some babies. Part of the philosophy of the book is that a baby must adapt to the family and the family should not adapt to the baby. ![]() Today, I will review 10 cautions you should consider when considering using this book or method. However, of course, as with any book you read, there may be things that aren’t quite the right fit for you and your unique situation. And, there are many positive things detailed in the book including “toolbox” ideas and a step-by-step action plan, which are very useful when you are a sleep-deprived parent. Suzy is a mom of five children, including one pair of fraternal twins, who had a knack for helping other families and wrote a book about it. The book is a very quick read and very easy to follow. Twelve Hours’ Sleep by Twelve Weeks Old is a book by Suzy Giordano and Lisa Abidin laying out steps you can follow to help your baby sleep through the night by a young age (12 weeks for singletons, a bit older for multiples).
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